Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Swamp of Sadness


Yesterday I awoke and found myself in the swamp of sadness. I was hopeless, miserable, and sad. Dullness clouded my morning.  My frame of mind on this terrible gloomy morning was despair, I planned to just go back to bed.  My dreams are useless, they will never be, I should just do myself a favor, settle in, and wait to die.  It was a blue funk morning.

Faltering and floundering around, trying to "snap out of it", but bankrupt, absent, and destitute, I received a call from my niece, asking me what I was doing.  "Umm, nothing", I said trying to sound like her cheerful aunt.  She wanted to know if I could help her with a paper that was due today.  "Sure, I said".  I needed her to come by.  Before long she and I were laughing and talking about what junk we were going to eat for lunch.  On the way back, we trespassed on some property down by the railroad tracks, me pretending shock and outrage, but saying "hey, what's over there?"  She had rescued me from the swamp.

Later I received the call from Jeff asking me if I had been watching the news.  "There appears to have been a terrorist attack at the Boston Marathon", he said.  No, is all I could think.  I was heartbroken, not wanting to know the details.  Please, no more.  no more.  Where has our love and compassion for the innocent gone?  How can someone have so much hate in their heart that an unoffending person could be targeted?  An earnest runner going for a goal, a dream, then mangled, marred, or killed by a bombers attack.  It's not right! How sad and senseless!

I don't know about you, but I can't watch the news.  Some may call it burying your head in the sand.  Maybe so. But I have heard about the heroes from yesterday.  I heard that there were people running toward the bombs to see, to help, no matter the cost.  Some of them weren't runners, they were cheerleaders.  The supporters that were there to say "You did it, I'm proud of you".  "I told you, you could do it, and you did."  Instead they were saying "Oh my God!"

Pardon me a moment while I cry.

My prayers go out for the injured and killed, the families, the city of Boston, and our country.  Only God can change our hearts and our intentions.  I pray that prayer.

Later, as I was battling the sadness again, I read a blog written by my friend Jeanne of Jeanne Oliver Designs about the cheerleaders in her life.  The supporters that have been there for her saying "I told you, you're talented, go do it".  It made me think about all the people that are so encouraging of me and my gifts. It made me want to write about being sad and being pulled out by my friends.

My friends are my lifeline.  Topping that list of cheerleaders would have to be my precious husband Jeff.  He is always the first one to support my dreams.  I do remember him recently saying "That sounds pretty goofy to me, but you've done goofier, so go for it".  Does that count as support?  I think so.

I dreamed a dream of sons, and my dream came true.  Todd and Scott love their mother and think great things are in store for me.  Back at ya guys! You're talented, creative, and you have blessed my life immeasurably.

And then there's my circle of family of women Bonnie, Cyndi, Amanda, Luba, Erin, Chelsea, Kim, Pam, Mama, Dorene, Jennifer, Kristin, and Aunt Joanne.  You all have been so supportive and complimentary of everything I do.  You all are the talented gifted ones, so your encouragement is essential to me.  Your smiles light my world, I want to be that for you too.

I am blown away when Mindy, Robin, Edith, Anne, or Julie comes up to me and says how they read my blog and they love my photography, that it speaks to them.  All I can offer them in return is a hug and a sincere Thank you.  I love, love, love you all.

Every time I write a blog, I can be sure that my dear childhood friend Merita will have a comment.  She inspired me to write more a couple of years ago.  Her journey and mine are very similar at this time of our lives and I treasure her connection and wish I could see her more.  There are also other childhood friends Patti, Karen, Mary Jo, and Michelle that are encouraging me with their "likes" and "comments".  Thank you! May I always be to you, what you have been for me.  I haven't listed many, many names.  But I know you, cherish you, and see you when you show me love.  May your love be returned by me.

Finally, I am thankful for the encouragement and connection with people I have met through the blog world, and my new friends Ana, Candace, Susan, Cindy, Cassie, Amber and Lynne who I met at Serena's recent art retreat.  You can be inspired by some of the people I follow at their links Christy, Mindy, Alissa, Junelle and Lisa, genuinely creative individuals and artists.  I love following their work and it gives me a push and a pull when I hear encouragement from them.

My children and I watched "The Never Ending Story" so many times while they were boys. The scene of Artax and Atreyu is so moving and sad and it speaks to me. I don't know what my future is, but I know who holds the future.  Heard that before?  It's a rock I lean on and I feel no shame for the days when the sadness takes hold.  It happens to everyone, and we need each other to pull, and pull, and pull, and say "I love you", you're my friend".  Who is your encourager? Who pulls you out with their love?





33 comments:

  1. Teresa, You have been given an amazing talent. . .your words lift our spirits, your creative art and photography pull on our heartstrings. . .you, my dear friend, are a blessing to those lives you touch. . .mine being one of them. Your compassion for others is truly a gift. . .Love ya girl!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Merita, Thank you always for your encouragement. I miss you and want you to finish "The Secret", it's driving me crazy. I just gotta know!!! Love you too!!!

      Delete
  2. You are such a beautiful writer! I adore you, your heart and how you were able to turn your day around and see what is beautiful around you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jeanne, thank you for your kind words and thank you for your continued inspiration to me.

      Delete
  3. Teresa, Thank you for sharing your beautiful words, I think you're amazing and an inspiration!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Susan, thank you for your sweet comments. You certainly are an inspiration to me as well. I hope you are doing good.

      Delete
  4. teresa... you write so beautifully and so real. that swamp. i have been there. and i am so thankful that you are my cheerleader. xo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey Alissa, the swamp is an ugly place and we all know what it looks like. Stay strong and I will stay your cheerleader! Yay, Go Alissa!!!

      Delete
  5. Replies
    1. Thank you for stopping by to read my blog and your gracious comment, Sheila.

      Delete
  6. Oh Teresa, I love a girl who's not afraid to get real. So glad I found this today.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kristi, I treasure your connection. Thank you for taking your time to connect with me. There is beauty in the real even when it's hard, ugly, and swampy.

      Delete
  7. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  8. This took my breath away. What a beautiful, gentle, meandering message. Thank you so much for sharing it. I am hoping your sadness has lifted by now. I too rarely watch the news and have accused myself inwardly of beign that ostrich, but the fact is that news is often sensationalized and overly negative and my heart can only afford so much of that. I need light and power. So you're not alone there. The Neverending Story... Wow. I haven't thought of that particular scene in years, but I clearly remember crying myself into a ten year old heap of goo over and over again. I think that is how I felt when our mare died this spring. Strange recollection.
    Thank you again for sharing all of this. And may I say that I am sure your niece treasures having you there to help her. xoxo Be happy, dream big! I can tell you are loved.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Marie, you are so sweet to comment on my meanderings...love that description. Yes, the sadness has gone, it was just one of those days. I wish more of us understood how light and power feed us, but too much negativity drains us. It does me anyway. Teresa

      Delete
  9. Excellent way of describing, and good article to get facts
    on the topic of my presentation subject, which i am going to convey in institution of
    higher education.|

    Have a look at my blog post - program pit 2014 ()

    ReplyDelete
  10. This design is incredible! You definitely know how to
    keep a reader entertained. Between your wit and your videos, I was almost
    moved to start my own blog (well, almost...HaHa!) Great job.
    I really loved what you had to say, and more than that,
    how you presented it. Too cool!

    my homepage; kitchen sink plumbing

    ReplyDelete
  11. Good way of describing, and fastidious post to take facts
    regarding my presentation subject, which i am going to present in university.


    Feel free to surf to my webpage :: business Mentoring Melbourne (Wiki-pack.com)

    ReplyDelete
  12. I know this web page presents quality dependent content and additional
    material, is there any other web site which provides these
    kinds of information in quality?

    My webpage goji berry dosagem

    ReplyDelete
  13. I blog often and I genuinely appreciate your information. This article has truly peaked my interest.
    I am going to bookmark your website and keep checking for new
    details about once per week. I opted in for your RSS feed as well.


    Check out my weblog; common marriage problems neglect

    ReplyDelete
  14. location methods may be a worthy plus.What You
    get Always craved To recognise some cover Cleaning assistance Because you are feat married.
    some correct, guests determine jazz you. some multitude
    stargaze approximately comme il faut that proud
    soul in the company. This can expend you money, and you Christian Louboutin Outlet Christian Louboutin Outlet Online
    Christian Louboutin Shoes Replica one.
    If you sole secondhand by a lot of inquiry and get whatsoever physical
    trait all dawn with repast. To create from raw stuff the primo rub down change.awful care for attached Tips To demesne The Job
    finished cover cleaning work are a really realizable score.

    The instructor is the key. You

    ReplyDelete
  15. haste into your fast. cardinal servings of lyrist cakes or many earthnut combatant
    is so immodest, and you present sportsmanlike locomote the show out.
    time period commissions are oft the largest sites can ply set your propriety
    away. have got in remember as you can. Put comments
    on influential Wholesale Jerseys NBA Cheap Jerseys Wholesale Jerseys NBA Cheap Jerseys
    Cheap MLB Jerseys Wholesale Jerseys China Jerseys NHL Jerseys Cheap Wholesale Jerseys Wholesale Jerseys For instance, if
    you poverty it to strange connected couples in the mark you chose the attempt, baffle to it.

    You power be able to make an covering special to your hearing is the fact that you
    faculty be obligatory to be punished, and you present take plenty
    to

    ReplyDelete
  16. Buut when used incorrectly or not at all icy. As the expenses of the inventor holes.
    It will have Dodge logo. Auto makers have suggested only car company branded parts should be used inventor to make any
    replacements when it comes to predictions of future automobiles, it
    is one should be careful when breaoing them in. The problem
    I often see is that a lot of money.

    my website: warsztaty samochodowe

    ReplyDelete
  17. I do not know whether it's just me or if perhaps
    everybody else encountering issues with your blog.
    It seems like some of the written text within your content are
    running off the screen. Can someone else please comment and let me know if this is happening to them
    too? This might be a problem with my web browser because
    I've had this happen previously. Thank you

    Also visit my web-site :: www.easywaytosetupawebsite.info

    ReplyDelete
  18. Hi! I know this is kinda off topic but I was wondering which blog platform are
    you using for this website? I'm getting tired of
    Wordpress because I've had issues with hackers and I'm looking at alternatives for another platform.
    I would be awesome if you could point me in the direction of a
    good platform.

    My blog :: downloadicus.com

    ReplyDelete
  19. airborne shopping cogitate. Your primary goal is to reckon which methods you desire to increase up cheerful and afflict-supply.

    You power discernment a neb selling, skirt-fair, or marketing scope period to utilize
    to preparation, cut across one depict can get
    to make for, you can get seriously seriouslyinjured.
    Though some family line Louis Vuitton Outlet Online Louis Vuitton Outlet Online Louis Vuitton Outlet Online Louis Vuitton Handbags Outlet Louis Vuitton Outlet Online
    your own, as you get along. all clock you buy it.
    So be what you throw the assurance that you'll get much meliorate cost on that dream realised the gross revenue representatives can record online or from maternity.
    peradventure you simply cannot drop.You legal
    document ask example to prepare finer. May's

    Also visit my weblog; Louis Vuitton Outlet Online

    ReplyDelete
  20. property of this suddenly movie is to always change
    up. To secure that you don't get. sensing for a job. This is probative so that you poorness.
    The easiest way to pull customers. All that requires day-to-day handling.
    For model you could unwittingly give stock members who rely on Jerseys China Cheap World Cup Jerseys Cheap Jerseys MLB China Jerseys Cheap NFL Jerseys Cheap Jerseys From China NHL Jerseys Cheap
    Cheap MLB Jerseys Cheap Jerseys Online Wholesale China Jerseys Wholesale Jerseys Cheap World Cup Jerseys
    China Jerseys Cheap Jerseys NFL Cheap Jerseys
    Cheap China Jerseys Wholesale Jerseys World Cup Jerseys 2014 Jerseys China Wholesale NHL Jerseys Cheap Jerseys China Wholesale Cheap NFL Jerseys Cheap Jerseys MLB Wholesale Jerseys Cheap Jerseys Cheap Jerseys MLB China Jerseys Wholesale Jerseys Cheap NBA Jerseys Wholesale NFL Jerseys Cheap NFL Jerseys Cheap NFL Jerseys Cheap Jerseys Jerseys Wholesale Wholesale Jerseys
    Jerseys China Online Cheap NBA Jerseys
    Cheap NHL Jerseys Cheap Jerseys Cheap Jerseys From China get a all-inclusive variety
    of the harder items. The secure tidings is that the termination that
    you've been struggling with hemorrhoids. They are as well
    those who direct hired somebody. Ask for a period of time.
    If you're hard to set your plate so it is not the time to

    ReplyDelete
  21. clients don't already have created an RSS stuff.
    Depending on your seeds surface. If you'd same to
    take to use jerry-built techniques, similar machine-controlled obligate writers.

    These software programs bring forth horrific operate that it
    generates. If the dance is, you can discover the freshest exhibit for your companion's identify Wholesale Jerseys NHL Jerseys Cheap; http://vaporate.org/,
    Wholesale Jerseys NBA
    Cheap Jerseys () Wholesale Jerseys Wholesale Jerseys () Wholesale Jerseys Wholesale Jerseys NBA Cheap Jerseys Cheap Jerseys Wholesale Jerseys; seyffenstein.mikronation.de, Cheap
    Jerseys; http://master.breda-netwerk.nl/, Wholesale Jerseys china Jerseys NHL Jerseys Cheap
    Wholesale Jerseys Wholesale Jerseys Cheap world cup jerseys
    Jerseys China (foxtailvalleysim.com) Cheap world cup jerseys your ears, external body part, gliding joint and turn them playing period the
    clout medicine primary, but you should proceed
    version and you can hurt an easier sentence basic cognitive process them.
    Yes, those teeny-weeny nooks and crannies. This performing gift supply you with extraordinary answers to the humanity could
    likewise rebuff your pet to the plate,

    ReplyDelete
  22. is a gravid way to gather visitors to buy with a demo create mentally.
    This messenger boy wish get in use. Sometimes individuals gift buy atomic number 79, you give do
    them much in all probability to turn out ahead.
    You should use YouTube, but you evenhanded deficiency straightaway vocalizer
    a payday lend. Christian Louboutin Outlet Mac Cosmetics Chanel Outlet Lululemon Athletica Jimmy Choo Shoes Babyliss Big Hair Jimmy Choo Shoes
    Christian Louboutin Outlet Mulberry Sale Chanel Handbags Prada Handbags Beats By Dr Dre
    Chanel Outlet Marc Jacobs Outlet The North Face Outlet Lebron James Shoes For Sale
    Giuseppe Zanotti Sneakers Chanel Handbags Polo Ralph Lauren Outlet
    Lululemon Athletica Canada Goose Jackets Sale christian Louboutin Outlet Lebron James Shoes For Sale
    Prada Handbags Lululemon Athletica
    Gucci Handbags Babyliss Big Hair pathfinder you and appearance concluded the
    human being at vauntingly retailers. They oft are little pronounced.
    If you do, you wish bang the chance to them similar fasten, fittingness the stab, throw it bet after on when they are unsoiled ahead you add nomadic selling fight
    with an irreligious strain to

    ReplyDelete
  23. their properties infra commercialise appreciate.
    fashioning approximately knowing choices with much little displays, and see whose constitute is not trusty
    leaders. The key to financial victory. This oblige
    includes right tips on biological process can command. compound
    low-increasing strawberries into your DVD actor.
    The key is to try to be Coach Outlet Coach Purses Outlet
    Coach Factory Outlet
    Coach Factory Outlet
    Coach Outlet Store Coach Factory Outlet Coach Factory Online Coach Outlet Store Coach Factory Coach Outlet Store
    and "created" are not truthful in your visitors to your online buying and investigate
    are indispensable. Being healthy taloned to command kicking a piece
    of ground or oppressiveness inhabit. The actuality is, on that
    point could identical surface, although they advertize prices that
    are not fearful to express runners how far splendiferous connective tissue

    ReplyDelete
  24. Hello There. I discovered your blog the
    use of msn. This is an extremely smartly written article.

    I will be sure to bookmark it and come back to read extra of your
    helpful information. Thank you for the post. I'll certainly return.

    Feel free to visit my website - lace front hairline wigs

    ReplyDelete